“Once your mindset changes, everything on the outside will change along with it"

- Steve Maraboli

If you have found yourself back on the dating scene again or back here for the first time in a long time- I am sure you want to be as prepared as you possibly can be to achieve the ultimate goal; your happy ever after. Here are a few hints to help you along the way to programming your mind for love.

1.Think clearly. Write it all down. In life we all aim to achieve the ultimate level of happiness in all areas of our being. We may get pro-active and structured with actionable points and tasks, which is a very organised way to help us reach that desired end page. As with anything we do it’s not about what we want or how we are going to achieve it, but merely about our mindset and the way we think about getting what we want; so get positive.

2.Self Belief. A lot of individuals attract the wrong people into their lives and sometimes the wrong relationships; which will inevitably land them in a not-so-desired end page. If you find that you are struggling for self-love then perhaps you don’t know your self-worth. If this is you then you will possibly end up attracting less than you truly deserve into your life so it's important to make sure you are in a good place. It’s really important to be fully happy with you before you can make someone else happy.

3.Your Limiting Expectations. These are a HUGE factor holding us back from what it is that we truly want and need to make for a wholesome, happy life. When it comes to dating we really need to revisit our list of expectations in an ideal match. In my time I have seen this shopping list mentality so often when someone has been looking for a match either online or offline. Singles forget that when looking for love they are looking for another human being. As human beings we grow, we change and we are continually learning. Whatever's on your list today for your 'ideal match' could change tomorrow. My advice to you would be - scrap it. You're not picking up a basket of shopping at Waitrose you're looking for love and for the long term. Make sure your expectations are not limiting you from the love you so deserve.

4.Ask Believe and you shall Receive. If you are really serious in your search for someone to love then your actions have to speak just as loud as your words and thoughts for that matter. You have to really put yourself out there and consider as many options for you as possible. Make sure to really bring what you want to you by affirmations of love, believing that you truly deserve the ultimate level of happiness. I think the law of attraction is really powerful and so if you haven't read it yet then you should definitely download 'The Secret'.

5.Build your strategy for love success. What will be will be...but it helps if you have a strategy in place to help you along the way to finding love. Make sure to cover all bases using tools online and offline that put you in a position to be dating people just like you. Be mindful not only what you want but what you can bring to your special someone. It's not all about you and what you want you need. Think about what you have to offer potential suitors and if it's in leaps and bounds then they are one lucky thing.

6.Be pro-active. The love of your life could be anywhere. Working all the hours of the day is wonderful for our professional lives but are our personal lives taking a huge hit because of this? Balance is crucial to ensure we are living a life well rounded and to keep us happy. Speaking of which, if you want to be happy and it's a 'goal' it should also be a journey as well as a destination for you. Make sure you are already happy in you to ensure you attract the happy person and relationship you so desire.

7. Don't be a forever student. The only way we learn in life is to fail. If you work on the premise that failure is not an option, especially when it comes to love, then you are missing a very big point. We have to fail and keep on failing in order to learn the most about what we want and who we are. If you keep on studying your options and not actually getting out there then you will never learn what it is that you truly want. I suppose what I am really saying is yes, date lots and you might find that through quantity you find quality. You may also learn that the type you have in mind isn't really your 'type' at all. Why do I say this? Well if it was your 'type' then you would have found your someone already I'm sure. You may need to compromise on your list of specifics and that's just me being honest- I believe this really is the key to unlocking finding your person.

Kiss many frogs in order to find your prince or princess and remember most of the things that hold us back in life, and most of all in love; are our mindset. We have to change the way we think in order to get what it is we truly want. Happiness comes from within.

@FabSarahRyan